Brave New World (with New Norms)

I realized this morning that one of the challenges about living in Chile is establishing new benchmarks in my life for "normal." The norms of schedules, points of reference, cultural appropriateness, communication, lifestyle choices, etc. change. Some of the changes are drastic and some are barely noticeable but all demand attention and force me to redefine "normal" in my life. The process of determining new normals requires that I figure out what normals I need to incorporate from the Chilean culture, to set aside from the American culture, and to embrace from my gringa heritage.

This process is challenging since I am reflecting on what I regarded as "normal" most of my life, what I perceive as "normal" here, and how I plan to define my "normal" for the future.

Here are few examples of finding new normals:

• Follow-up. How much should I keep following-up with people? In the US, I can (I hope!) generally know when I am following up with someone and when I am starting to annoy them and need to back off. Here, I find that I need to follow-up a lot, especially with community based organizations. So, what is the "normal" between following up with someone or annoying them?
• Food. Adjusting what I eat, how I eat, what times I think are normal for eating. I was at a BBQ the other day and people literally put the meat on a cutting board and then passed it around with a fork a knife. People would cut a bit sized piece, eat it, and then pass the meat and same utensils to the next person. So, I am adjusting to this more environmentally friendly (no paper plates) and possibly not quite as a sanitary way of eating. Also, chocolate and peanut butter, which are normally two of the sections towards the bottom of Beth Anne's food pyramid, are non existent here. 
• People. This ranges from figuring out when to use "tú" or "usted" to how to read social queues to what are good conversation starters. For the record, people here tend to be quite a bit more straightforward right off the bat. For example when yours truly was a little sunburned, after meeting me for the first time, multiple people said things like, "You are really red," or, "You are the color of a tomato." Thanks, good to hear. Being that straightforward is just normal here. So, I am adjusting and smiling when people mention that I should use more sunblock.
• Time. The day starts later, stores are not open early, the nights are longer, people work on a schedule that seems conceivable only to them, and I experience many opportunities of learning to wait...patiently. At first, I found it frustrating when people would say I will meet you at 3:00 and then show up around 4:00 but then I realized that this time difference is the norm here. I have yet to establish my norm with when I should show up or be ready. So, I just show up "on time" and always have a book with me. 

As exciting as defining and exploring new norms can be, the process can also feel lonely and isolating. Finding new normals and establishing balance between the old and the new, the former and the future reminds me of one of my favorite quotes from Oh, The Places You'll Go!, a favorite read of mine-

You'll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You'll get mixed up

with many strange birds as you go.

So be sure when you step.

Step with care and great tact

and remember that Life's

a Great Balancing Act.

Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.

And never mix up your right foot with your left.